I will add this to main cast wikia soon but i cba now
PART 1 – SATANS RITAUL
Claire : Where the fuck is my wine
Mandy : Shut the fuck up were going to revive Tom
Bela : Who’s Tom?
The Whole Room Goes Silent
Wubzy : God Bela don’t have to be so rude
Bela : What did I do?
Mandy: Bela your on a 10 now bring it down to a 6
Bela : Whaaaa
Suddenly someone knocks on the door
Claire : What was that, was it my wine supply
Wubzy : For fuck sake who is this
Mandy walks to the front of the door and opens it
??? : Guess who got out of jail bitches
Insert Dramatic Music Here
Mandy: What
Bela : The
Wubzy: Fuck
Criminal : Hola cunts
Claire : Where the fuck is my wine
Mandy: What are you doing here
Criminal : I was set free
Bela : Literally what the actual
Criminal : Guess who is here as well
Jessica : Who wants free blowjobs
Mandy : Wow so rude
Wubzy : I can’t handle this hype
Bela : THE RITUAL IS WORKING
Everyone rushes to the pentagram and starts chanting random ass shit
Harley : I’m bored play with my vagina
Criminal : Tom what the actual fuck
Harley : I’m not Tom, I’m Harley Quinn
Mandy: This makes no fucking sense
Claire : The family never made sense
Mandy: True
12 hours after the climatic entrance of Jessica Criminal and Tom/Harley another bitch decides to return
Ulises : Where is Steph my waifu
Mandy: Ulises heyyyyy
Ulises : WHERES STEPH
Criminal : She was kidnapped
Ulises : WHAT? I never actually gave a shit about her anyway , so get me some tacos
Mandy: What is with everyone today
Criminal : I pumped the house with drugs
Mandy: Hot
Meanwhile below the house in the wine supply
Claire : I will literally drink all this wine in about 4 seconds, I want more
??? : Sorry Ma’am but we just couldn’t get enough in time
Claire : This is the third you fucked up, thats it
Claire gets a wine bottle and beats the shit out of that random person
Harley : SICK , Lets mix his blood with wine and drink it
Bela and Mandy decided to go drag queen shopping
Mandy : This makeup is hot as
Bela : But this dress slays
Mandy: True but these heels
Wubzy then runs into drag queen shop
Wubzy: Guys we need to get back to the house
Bela : Who died now
Everyone returns to the house
Wubzy : I got them
Bela : WHATS GOING ON TELL ME
Criminal : It’s Claire, look
Claire lays lifeless on the ground as everyone crowds around her
Claire : Ugh
Mandy: See shes fucking fine
Claire : I love wine but hate hangovers
Bela : Lets go Mandy
Bela and Mandy leave
Ulises : Way to scare us
Claire : Boo
Criminal : That was not a joke, that was not funny
Claire : Shut up and get me wine
In a room Harley was fingering herself then all of a sudden Batman comes in
Batman : Bend over Harley you have been a naughty girl
Harley : Oh my fucking god
Batman whips out his dick and Harley runs and sucks on his dick hard
Batman and Harley are fucking all day
Harley : HARDER HARDER UGH UGH UGH
Batman : You like that baby
Batman spanks Harley’s ass and bangs her harder
Harley : YES BABY
Then all of a sudden someone stabs Batman in the heart and stabs him over and over and over until he is dead
Mandy : HARLEY IS MINE BITCH
Harley : That was so hot
Downstairs
Bela : But I wanted that fucking maze with Satan at the end of each path
Asian : Were on a budget
Bela : FUCK YOU AND YOUR BUDGETS
Bela pulls out and knife and slits Asian’s throat
Criminal : Wow Bela classy
Bela : Shut the fuck up bitch you killed like 10 people
Jessica : Does no-one love me
Claire : Jessica fetch me some wine
Jessica : Yes Mummy
Jessica leaves into the kitchen
Criminal : That girl is so fucki.....
Suddenely Jessica screams from the kitchen
Bela : What the fuck was that
Claire, Bela , Criminal all run into the kitchen
Claire : Oh for fuck sake she dropped my wine
Criminal: She’s fucking dead
Bela : Whatever she was a maid she knew the risks
Claire bends down and crys into her wine
Bela : Oh for fuck sake
Everyone sits down in the living room
Wubzy : Okay so were all going to point to who we think the killer is
Wubzy: 3 , 2 , 1
Everyone points to Criminal
Criminal : Oh what the fuck
Mandy : Shes killed once she can kill again
Criminal : I was with fucking Bela and Claire while she was being killed
Claire : Where you I don’t remeber , I was probally drunk
Bela : You werent with us , SHES THE KILLER
Wubzy : So whos in favour of voting Criminal out of the house
Criminal : Hold up Harley fucking kills people
Harley : And , I was being fucked by Batman while that bitch was dying
Mandy : True I witnessed it
Criminal : If you fucking kick me out of the house I swear to god I will kill you filthy mongrils
Bela : Doesn’t help your case that no-one died while you were gone
Criminal : STEPH DIED WHEN I WASNT HERE
Mandy : She died when I was playing pokemon go with her
Criminal : Bullshit
Wubzy : Okay so who votes to get rid of Criminal
Everyone raises their hands
Claire : Get out bitch
Criminal : Fuck you
